WELCOME + CHECK-IN 6 Minutes

Activity: The Human Knot

Instructions for Facilitators:
  1. Have all participants stand in a circle (8-12 people works best)
  2. Each person reaches across the circle with their right hand to grab someone else's right hand (not the person next to them)
  3. Then each person reaches across with their left hand to grab a different person's left hand
  4. Without letting go of hands, the group must work together to untangle themselves back into a circle
  5. Encourage communication and problem-solving as they work
Purpose & Expected Outcomes:
  • Break the ice and create energy in the group
  • Demonstrate the importance of communication and cooperation
  • Set the stage for discussing how we connect with and support each other
  • Introduction to the theme of relational needs and interdependence
MINI-TEACH 8 Minutes

Dr. John Townsend's Four Quadrants

Dr. John Townsend's research identifies 22 specific relational needs organized into four quadrants. These "relational nutrients" are essential for human flourishing, leadership development, and emotional health. Just as our bodies need physical nutrients, our souls need these relational nutrients to thrive and develop strong character.

The Four Quadrants of Relational Needs

QUADRANT 1: BE PRESENT
Unconditional felt-love and felt-acceptance.
Acceptance: Connect without judgment
Attunement: Connect with what another is experiencing
Validation: Convey that their experience matters
Identification: Share your similar story
Containment: Allow venting while staying warm
Comfort: Provide support for someone's loss
QUADRANT 2: CONVEY THE GOOD
Encourage and celebrate with words high in grace.
Affirmation: Draw attention to the good
Encouragement: Believe in someone's ability
Respect: Assign value
Hope: Provide confidence in the future
Forgiveness: Cancel a debt
Celebration: Acknowledge wins
QUADRANT 3: PROVIDE REALITY
High truth that catalyzes growth.
Clarification: Bring order to confusion
Perspective: Offer a different viewpoint
Insight: Convey deeper understanding
Feedback: Give a personal response
Confrontation: Face someone with appeal to change
QUADRANT 4: CALL TO ACTION
Challenge someone to take steps toward growth.
Advice: Recommend an action step
Structure: Provide a framework
Challenge: Strongly recommend difficult action
Development: Create a growth environment
Service: Guide engagement to giving back
Four-Quadrant Movement Activity:
  1. Post the four quadrants in the corners of the room or designate four areas
  2. Explain each quadrant briefly
  3. Ask students to walk around to each location and read each of the relational nutrients listed in each quadrant
  4. Ask the guiding questions one at a time and have students move physically to the quadrant that represents their answer
  5. Ask one person per quadrant to share a sentence or two about why they are standing where they are standing
Guiding Questions:
1 Which quadrant feels most supplied in your life?
2 Which quadrant feels most lacking in your life?
3 Which quadrant do you most offer others?
4 What quadrant do you need to focus growth in offering?